Shades of Purple

Waiting..

Waiting..

I’m tired of it. "Patience is a virtue", the old saying goes, but my patience could not be stretched to infinity. There is a limit to it..

So does my perseverance. I guess, i just have to learn how to keep my cool, keep my head so it won’t burst and keep my feet firmly on the ground.

It has been quite a journey. These past few months a lot of things has happened but the journey is not even half over. It’s like a long winding road in front of me and i can’t see where the destination is. Emotionally drained, physically strained. I wish i could just run away from this burden that i have somehow been obliged to carry. I don’t know if this is called responsible, perserverance or stupidity. I can’t tell the difference anymore.

However, one thing is for sure. This journey that i have embarked on, if nothing becomes of it, have at least taught me to be strong against blows that would otherwise make me crumble. If i could not go through some hardship, i may not be able to pull through trying times in the future as well. "I’ll try, i’ll try..", i keep telling myself although somehow things seem impossible. "But you got this far, didn’t you? Just carry on a little more and see where it gets you", says this little voice in my head. I can’t tell if that’s pride or perseverance speaking.

What happens to motivation? Oh, it’s still there somewhere. I have to be careful or else i’ll lose myself. I’m not okay now but I still have my anchor.. and some friends. I’ll be alright I guess, but i still need some Curry.. and of course, where’s my salary?!! Aargh, more cause for distress…